sometimes i think i'm still in love with my ex-boyfriend. i've been looking for something monumental to open with and this surely isn't it. but at this rate i don't think i'll see anything monumental for a long, long time.
it's easy to say when i know that no one can hear me. it's something i think about more than i should. and it's not really something i can voice to those closest to me because it's a common fact that i'm better off without him.
the combination of he and i together was similar to a single bipolar sufferer. the highs were so high but the lows were so, so low. i suppose he and i were a disease for which there is no cure. profound, i know.
last night was a tour de exes in which i saw michael for the first time since we had split. he was having a birthday party and since we ended on fairly good terms, i felt it was in my civil ex duties to make an appearance. it was very good to see him and meet his new boyfriend. i know it's juvenile but it's strange to not harbor ill feelings towards an ex's current. i like it. it's, dare i say it, healthy.
last night i also saw erik, someone i've spent the night with about four times now but never officially dated. he also has a boyfriend whom i will not elaborate upon because i'm not one to air anyone's dirty laundry but my own. it was also good to see erik as it always is because he has become an outlet for my unabashed flirtation. and he takes it in stride, if you will.
i've got a long week ahead and i may still in love with my ex. to february.
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